If only he knew…..

Today, on my way back from work with my sister, we talked about Alston and how we grew close.

Going back to those days makes me happy and sad.

I am so happy to have met a guy like him.

He showed me so much love that for a brief moment he took all the negativity away and I was left with all the positive energy.

He was always encouraging me to be more and do more.

I am so thankful to have met a guy like him.

But of course, all good thing must come to an end.

We were such good friends when we were in two different state but in the same country and when we were in two different country.

But we’re not even good to each other when we’re in the same state and country.

I miss how after work I just tell him whatever that happened on the day.

I miss how he tells me things as it is.

We no longer speak to each other but I miss him a lot.

I don’t know if he misses me but most of the

I know people would say, “don’t miss someone who doesn’t think of you or misses you too”.

Don’t you know, I’ve lost my bestfriend. He was my bestfriend. I am sad knowing that we are no longer like we used to.

Before I met him, I made a promise to never be close to anyone anymore.

But after knowing him, I don’t want to lose him.

Now that we are no longer in talking terms,

I miss all those random conversation that seems endless even til the break of dawn.

He would never talked to me disrespectfully.

He would never blamed me for some miscommunication.

Instead he would always explain to me patiently and calmly.

We weren’t together, we weren’t in a relationship or anything but we were friends that get along so well that people asked me how did we get along just fine because it was hard for that person to try and get close to him.

I love him, I really do, I wouldn’t deny how much I love him because he was the first one to say it.

Putting his matter aside.

I met Kelv Ting at Bing! and he asked me about how’s things between me and als. He would want to have a farewell party for me before I work elsewhere. I told him that I don’t need a farewell party because it’s not important and I wouldn’t want other people to know that I’m leaving Kuching, especially Als. Besides, he would say, “good for her”

The thing that Als don’t know is that, I come back to Kuching was to wait for him. He said that he’ll be back and he won’t leave me in Kuching alone and we could hang out but then, Life happens. We hardly hang out. I got tired of trying all the time and everything just doesn’t matter to him anymore. I mean our friendship just didn’t matter anymore.

I am sad.

Later days,

Double Zee.

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